Sunday, May 23, 2010

The Agitation of the Appliance Life As I Know It


Hello friends! As most of you know, I work at Best Buy. What comes to mind when one ponders that of "Best Buy?" Computers, cameras, TVs, Blue Ray Disc Players, Wii, XBOX, PS2, iPod, Macbook and of course THE GEEK SQUAD. Yes, those things comprise the bulk of all that is Best Buy, but there's more. What else can you get at Best Buy? Well you can get books and all things made by THE SHARPER IMAGE--but there in the corner of every Best Buy is a super-store unlike any other. One full of shiny, stainless steel...tango red, platinum, blue steel (I kid you not--just like Zoolander)and midnight black and blue...a playground for up-and-coming Generations looking to step into all that buying a home brings, i.e. Appliances. Yes. This is the Shangri La of Best Buy. It's a pretty peaceful piece of real estate. For those who don't appreciate the symphony of hummmmms coming from the refrigerators & freezers, it is a place of quiet desperation...a place where salesmen and women go to die a slow death--plagued with the responsibility to know all things about washers and dryers; top loaders & front loaders--ENERGY STAR qualified products & those that are not. I am on the side of both opinions: it is both peaceful and mind-numbingly boring. I keep the time by making a lot of "TO DO" lists, most of which I never really get around to doing.
On the night of Sunday, May 16th, the Appliance Life as I knew it was forever changed. Things became interesting and I was forever changed...
A young couple came in looking for a washer and dryer. They seemed "normal" enough, possessing the innate distrust of all sales people and genuine inability to separate me as a person from "the MAN" known as "Best Buy." After 2 and a half hours of negotiations, we finally came to an agreement. I'm not fond of the "sales dance" at all--the customer is shown the product, the customer wants to talk the seller down, the seller(me) approaches the "highers ups" with the proposition; the seller returns to the potential buyer with the terms of the possible agreement--the buyers want more than what is being offered--the higher ups are unmoved by their request--and the seller is left to salvage what is left of a not so fun sale and so on and so on. Most of the time I feel like I'm in some sort of mix between a made for comedy mafioso genre TV show, Let's Make a Deal and Candid Camera. I check my peripherals on the regular, just waiting for a covert TV host (who may or may not sound and look like Tony Soprano) to pop out of a refrigerator and say, "$1500 for a washer & dryer for my family? Forget about it! You've insulted the family...Gotcha..." I'm totally serious. Back to my story...
I finally make the worst sale ever--there was no money to be made in this sale--at all. But you know me, I don't get caught up in things I cannot change. They were happy, so I was happy. I ring up the sale at the register...the receipt sputters out of the shoot...I hand them the receipt and say, "You guys said you have a truck right? Go ahead and pull it up to the front and I'll be up there momentarily with some guys to help load it." They look at me. They look at each other. They look at me and laugh. "Uhhh, ma'am...we've got a truck. The question is do you have a forklift?" I thought, "Oh my dear sweet Jesus! What is that supposed to mean?" It was now 20 minutes past the time I was supposed to be off. Best Buy is a ghost town. I'm looking for anyone to help me wrap the washer and dryer. I find a fellow and he helps me. It took us 15 minutes to complete this endeavor because these were floor models and they were shoved behind a steel plate that kept us from being able to remove them. We had to move 2 washer and dryer sets, just to get to the ones that I had sold. We made it. Now all we have to do is move them to the front of the store, load them and then we can go home. We make our may to the front. I'm relieved...I have a little spring in my step while pushing the dolly because I'm hungry and I can't wait to go get something to eat. I see the front doors...the finish line...I'm elated. Then it happened. I look outside and it's pouring down rain. That in and of itself would have easily thwarted the hopes of most people, but I was unmoved--I like the rain. But then I turn my attention to the noise I'm hearing--not that of thunder but an old familiar sound I hear when I'm driving down the interstate. That symphony of hydraulic brakes and clanging diesel engines...it was the sound of a SEMI. I think to myself, "Oh no you didn't. Tell me you didn't just sell this to the people sitting in the foreboding, massive, black, steel encased nightmare of a truck? Oh yes you did! Ahhhh man...this is hilarious...oh crap...how are we going to get this in there?" We watched in shock as the driver of this "big-rig" pushed a button and made the truck bed ascend to a very impressive 90 degree vertical. I had never seen this before. This indeed was a first in my history and in the history of Best Buy. Well between myself and two other guys, one of which is smaller than me, we did it. We were soaking wet, the guys were covered in the cement and mud from the truck--but we made it. I hope you've enjoyed this very small glimpse into my fun life as I know it ;)

1 comment:

Lauren said...

You didn't tell me this story! I guess it's ok that I read it here first--doesn't take away from the goodness of the story at all. "Kristen: Life as I know it" should have a subtitle--"I can't make this stuff up."